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I have no male friends

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Can men and women be friends? Avoid sending mixed signals and losing friends of the opposite sex with these expert-backed tips. There's a clear line between being interested in a guy's life and being interested in the guy. At least, we think so: Men often misinterpret female friendliness as sexual interest, while women often think a guy is just being nice when, really, he's flirting, says a new study in Evolutionary Psychology.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How to Become Friends with a Guy

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Deal With Your Girlfriends Male Friends

Why You Should Be Careful With The Guy Who Has No Male Friends

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FAQ on Coronavirus and Mefi : check before posting, cite sources; how to block content by tags. Is it normal to be a female and not have many okay, any close guy friends? Should I actively pursue friendships with guys? I mean close guy friends. The type of guy friend you call up to "hang out" and watch a movie, or whatever else it is that girls with guy friends do with them.

I didn't grow up with brothers. My older sister and mother are the two most important people in my life, and they don't seem to worry about guy friends either referring more to my sister, obviously.

I'd describe my sister and myself as independently-minded, feminine "girly"? My female friends are exceptional. They are all very secure with themselves, smart, and supportive.

I repel dramatic and insecure women naturally, I guess. It's not the case with guys at all. Sure, I've met guys with whom I've interacted in the context of various student groups and clubs.

We are always on friendly terms, and have good conversations and banter in person. One of them texted me to hang out a few times, but then I figured out he had feelings for me and I put an end to that, so as not to have to let him down later. I tried to ask a couple of guys to lunch, and they didn't seem keen on it. Honestly though, I am also confused about why you would be friends with a guy in the first place.

The couple friendships that have started to grow have turned into crushes from my end whereas in the beginning, there were no romantic feelings. Reflecting on that, I've never made an effort to be around some guy I see having zero dating potential. Should I try to ask guys to "hang out" more? Why aren't they asking me to do buddy-buddy type stuff? This issue is confusing for me, and as an reflective, introspective person who loves exploring human nature, it's a bit of a puzzle. Care to shed some light on the guy-girl friendship scenario?

Usually friendships come from shared interests. Women I've been friends with and there aren't many and none right now , I've always shared some interest such as sports, or as I've become a parent, how our kids get along.

I don't think it's imperative to HAVE to have a friend of the opposite sex. And as a guy, I'm constantly monitoring my motivations to have a platonic friendship with any female when I've had such relationships i. Furthermore, when I've been in romantic relationships, I've gone out of my way to not have female friends. Just too many complications. For a datapoint, I'm a male and I don't have any close female friends, except for exes.

I sound like you. I am a year-old woman with very few guy friends. I don't necessarily think this is the worst thing in the world; like you mentioned, my male friends and I would often struggle with friendship boundaries, and it just didn't seem worth the hassle any longer.

I stopped seeking out male friendships in freshman year of college, although I remain friendly. That said, I do consider myself friends with a few former coworkers, my boyfriends' friends and a few of my ex-boyfriends' friends. Because the boundaries are very clear male friend, not boyfriend , everyone is more comfortable about what is expected and acceptable.

There are those who would say that it's weird for a woman to have any close guy friends. I wouldn't sweat it. You click with whoever you click with. I've gone back and forth on having close male friends--my first couple years of college, I had a lot of them, then not too many at all, now I'm back to a few. I think my friendships with male friends are not all that different from those with girls; we have interests or mutual friends in common or are coworkers or whatever.

I think one nice thing about having guy friends is hanging out with a group of them at the same time--I went to an all-girls' school for a while and for me it can be refreshing to get a break from all that girliness.

I currently have a boyfriend, so there is no ambiguity on that front, but I've had platonic male friends when I was single too.

Don't worry about it. You're not obligated to satisfy some quota of diversity in your group of friends. Let the chips fall where they may; if all your friends are women, then that's that. I mean, what's your goal -- to be able to say "Some of my best friends are male"? Opposite-sex friendships are often fraught with tension anyway, so count yourself lucky that you don't have to deal with that mess.

I have lots of guy friends and always have. My friendships with men have definitely changed through the years -- during college there was a fair amount of drama with friendships turning romantic and then fallout when the romance ended. Since getting together with my husband, it's been easier to have male friends without the drama. My close friendships with men at this point tend to be with married men. I have some single male friends, but if a guy doesn't want to hang out with my husband, I probably just wouldn't make the time for him outside of an occasional lunch, just because I don't see my husband enough to want to focus on social time that doesn't include him.

I know lots of couples that don't work this way, though. The key thing here, though, is that I have never had to seek out specifically male friendships.

I've always enjoyed hanging out with guys on a friendship level singly and in groups. If you don't click with a lot of men as friends, then there's no reason to seek that out. I'm female and most of my friends are guys, which honestly has a lot more to do with my internalized misogyny.

I really grew up thinking that boys were better, "masculine" stuff was better, etc etc and so ended up very much a man's woman I've dealt with this now and think I'm pretty healthy about it, but of course I still have most of my old friends, since we really are friends.

I think that, because of the way our culture positions women as "frivolous", as less decisive, as caretakers, as sexy bodies instead of sexual humans, etc etc it's a real sign of health for both men and women to value women as friends. I sought out women friends for a while because I was worried about my inability to value what is traditionally labeled "feminine".

Do you feel that you are undervaluing or otherwise messed-up about something and thus avoiding men friends? What do you feel you are missing? Why are you missing it? You sound fairly young; it's possible that as you get older you'll make guy friends naturally--more people will be in settled relationships and the men in your age cohort will have learned to be interested in women for more than just dates.

IME, quite a few friendships-- same- and opposite-gender -- have a small romantic or sexual element. I don't think people really actually create firewalls between friendship and romance. This isn't the same as "one person thinks of this as a friendship; the other is In Love"-- that's an uncomfortable imbalance that may resolve itself but often ends in tears.

TL; DR: Don't worry about it unless you can actually think of something specific that you're missing, or some specific anxiety about men that may be in play. What about ex-boyfriends? Just date someone, then when you break up, try to stay friends. I think if two people are mutually attracted to each-other there is going to be sexual tension at first. Then later on it might evolve into the "friend zone" after all the passion is worked out if you're not compatible for dating.

I used to have a ton of guy friends, and now not so much. I would like to, but as people pair off, it seems like the guys I meet aren't really seeking female friends. Honestly, my current crop of close guy friends are either gay or else I've known them forever. I like having guy friends. I find it easier to talk to guys. I am not that girly though, so I don't need to talk about periods and going to the spa or whatever women talk about.

Kidding, sort of. I am also not that attractive so I really have never had that tension issue where one of them fell in love with me. If it's not your thing I wouldn't worry about it. These two things have a lot to do with each other. You sound like you sort your male peers into romantic interests or not. You are interested in dating the former and limit your interaction with the latter. I had this same problem when I was younger, from the opposite side.

I was a boy who grew up in an all-boys family. Never had trouble making friends with other males, never had a real female friend. It wasn't until I stopped seeing the women around me as primarily datable or not, that I began to have friendships with women. As mentioned above, this first started to happen when my male friends began to have long-term relationship and I became friends with their partners.

It was a relief, frankly, to take the whole relashionship calculation off the tabe and just interact with them as people. Shared interests help, but thinking them as people first, and ignoring their desirability as possible dates is what did it for me. Seconding "you click with who you click with" - I wouldn't worry about it.

Some guys are also weird about not having girls as platonic friends and vice versa and it doesn't have anything to do with you as a person. I agree that it can be much easier when you're in a steady relationship, though it'll always depend on the other person. As anecdata, one of my closest friends is a girl I knew first and then introduced to my boyfriend and now they're friends too. On the other hand, last year one of my boyfriend's closest friends told him he couldn't hang out with my boyfriend anymore because he couldn't stand me - and this is after I'd thought we had become friends in our own right.

That's an extreme example, but my point is you never know what's going to happen.

How to Be Friendly (Not Flirty!) with Male Friends

There are many discreet ways of doing this. What company does he or she keep? How do they migrate the putrid waters of social media?

Eventually, Kelly became his default therapist, soothing his anxieties as he fretted over work or family problems. For generations, men have been taught to reject traits like gentleness and sensitivity, leaving them without the tools to deal with internalized anger and frustration.

By Cosmo Landesman for MailOnline. The one you are absolutely certain has no sexual interest in you whatsoever? That man is a liar. That man is a cheat. He is a con man guilty of friendship fraud.

When a Man Has No Male Friends

Home Recent Discussions Search. Single Peeps! To balance out the other thread What do you think about a man who has no guy friends but doesn't appear to be gay? August 28, PM 0. Honestly hes probably not I guy I would want to hang out with. Only because we wouldn't have anything in commen. I happen to like alot of things guys like so if he didnt do typical guy things we wouldn't have anything to talk about or do together. Did he just relocate to the area? Friendships between men usually have pretty easy dynamics and are not hard to make or maintain.

In defence of not having any male friends

One of the best ways to really get an idea of who a person is, is by looking at their friends. If he only hangs out with women, you need to be careful. Do you really want to date a guy like that? I said it. Just like most women need to have at least one female friend who they can go shopping with or drink wine with, guys have to have bros who they can do things with.

We were in our mid-twenties.

Growing up, James C. But sometime after high school, those once-strong bonds slowly started to deteriorate. White, heterosexual men have the fewest friends of anyone in America, according to a analysis of two decades of data published in the American Sociological Review.

Men Have No Friends and Women Bear the Burden

Annoying rhetoric and condescension aside, it does bring awareness to the very real lack of male friendship these days. Basically — it argues as a result of this tragedy, women have become emotional dumping grounds for men… a role which they hate. But as usual with these mainstream think pieces, it elides both the cause of this epidemic and the heart of the issue.

Not a penis among them. Well, to start with, I went to an all-girls school. Which, for the most part, was brilliant, but did leave me sorely lacking in exposure to men. Like a Jane Austen novel but with frosted lip-gloss. So the idea that you might know a boy and not turn it into a relationship just seemed like a total waste.

Beware the man with no female friends

Having no friends is sad and boring, to be sure. But it gets worse, with a lack of mates also more likely to result in an early grave. It's a given that men are bad at asking each other "are you OK? But we're also ridiculously awful at maintaining friendships and, in our middle age, securing new ones. That's almost as dangerous for us as diagnosed mental illness. Simply, you live longer when you have great friends. Myriad studies show that the more vibrant and deep your social connections, the lower your blood pressure, heart rate and even cholesterol.

Jun 10, - I don't think our friendship is as strong as the friendships I have with my female friends. We are attracted to each other and respect each other and.

Please refresh the page and retry. Can men and women ever be just friends? According to one new survey, the answer is a straight no.

FAQ on Coronavirus and Mefi : check before posting, cite sources; how to block content by tags. Is it normal to be a female and not have many okay, any close guy friends? Should I actively pursue friendships with guys? I mean close guy friends.

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